Underhanded Feedback-a glaring example

Before I get to why I am so ANGRY right now, I want to discuss leaving feedback and how to do that appropriately on Etsy. These are the things you should be focusing on when deciding what feedback to leave:
  • Customer Service
  • Speedy Shipping
  • Quality of the item (did it look like the picture)

If you are the buyer and the seller has been prompt, polite and accomodating, you leave positive feedback, right? What if there was some other issue that bothered you, but the customer service was fantastic and the item looked just like it did in the picture...the decent thing to do IS CONTACT THE SELLER DISCREETLY AND ASK FOR A REFUND OR EXCHANGE. You do not, I repeat do NOT leave underhanded feedback that will affect all their future sales without contacting them first. ESPECIALLY IF IT ISN'T TRUE.

This recently happened to an Etsy seller who is a good friend of mine. No, it did not happen to me. The person who did this to her is a BUYER ONLY and does not have a shop. She also referred to it as "positive feedback". Ha.

PS-the lesson learned today for sellers is NEVER LEAVE FEEDBACK FOR YOUR BUYER UNTIL YOU RECIEVE FEEDBACK FROM THEM! Someone might leave a comment about your items (that isn't true) and it could affect your sales and you will have no means of responding to their accusations.


  1. You are so right Tara! That's actually one of the downfalls of a site like Etsy over your own website- you are not able to choose from and post all the positive things your buyers say about your service and products. That's especially awful that it wasn't true! That one negative comment can affect many sales!
    I never thought about waiting to leave feedback from a buyer until you see what feedback they leave, but that's a very wise suggestion!

  2. good advice, glad I got it early on. That's just not cool. I once accidentally gave feedback before receiving an item, luckily I like it when it arrived. What is the effect if they don't leave any at all. I purchased something, left great feedback, and never heard from the seller again.

  3. I want to read the feedback. Wish you would have quoted it! I worry that one day I will get unfair negative feedback. I work so hard to make sure every aspect of the transaction is perfect- communication, product, packaging- but you can never tell what a customer will think. Some people are never happy...

  4. I totally agree and in fact I already practice that feedback rule. Thanks!

  5. I just got my first neutral FB from a buyer that took days to pay- after a warm welcome, gentle reminder to pay after a few days went by w/o a convo reply and eventually a re-sent invoice I got payment. But before the ink dried on the shipping label I received neutral FB the SAME DAY. Everyone knows you don't ship w/o payment!

    At first I chalked it up as a newbie buyer making a mistake, we're human, it happens..but
    the comment was made about the order before receiving it.

    It gets worse,they got glowing FB from me.I tried to contact them and even requested the "kiss and make up feature and they recently received their order - still no change. very upset about it.

    I agree with Amarshall's comment- Many good indie sellers work so hard to make every transaction perfect. We want to help you! If you're new or simply need help let us know!

    We WANT to hear from you as buyers- Your input help us become better sellers and we help you be better buyers. Communication heals and helps- lack of it ruins everything.

    oh gosh this post is long! sorry--I'm off the soap box now lol!Thanks K for posting this


  6. You are right Tara, I also think the best thing is to leave the buyer give his/her feedback first. I'm sorry for your friend, hopefully they will "kiss and make up"!

  7. How true! I go back and forth about waiting to leave feedback. Most buyers are super, but it only takes 1 careless remark from a buyer. Hope the buyer will do kiss and makeup for your friend.

    (Love the new orange look! I love orange!)

  8. Thanks you guys! I may have come off a little strong but this person (she asked that I not mention her shop)is one of the nicest Etsy sellers out there and she was very upset about the feedback. The feedback referenced the bad "smell" of the item (she dry cleans her items before sending them out). I don't like when my friends are upset! I am going to suggest the kiss and make up feature, I actually had never heard of that. Thank you again, your advice may rectify the situation!

  9. Awww that sucks Tara! I understand why you were so upset. I hope the kiss and make up feature will help your friend to. I wish i had worked for me;-(. But that's ok, My other customers love me and I love em' right back.

    Great post Tara


  10. Thanks for sharing this story. Good to know for a relatively newcomer like me. That totally sucks for your friend. Hopefully future customers will see all the truly positive comments and overlook the backhanded negative one she just received!

  11. Hi Angelina, it was such an eye opener for new and old etsy sellers I think! (myself included)Thank you Nyblaque, you make a great point, focus on all the positive feedback! Can anyone tell me how to find out more about the kiss and make up feature?

  12. I got a neutral from a buyer that did not contact me first for something that was totally rectifiable!

    I immediately refunded her a partial amount, tried to contact her to give her advice on what she could do or send it back to me to fix, and sent the kiss and make up request. NEVER heard from her... about the refund, tips, kiss and make-up... nothing. Luckily, it hasn't affected my sales (I don't think)!

  13. AWE-I think this is happening to more Etsy sellers than we know....I just read a great comment on the storque from a seller who also had this happen, I'm pasting it below with the link:

    can anything be done about the feedback system?
    the buyer can leave neutral (unfair) feedback without ever even communicating their concern with the seller.
    i had a buyer that did not read the description of the item and left me ugly neutral feedback without ever even contacting me! another one just left me neutral feedback about having to cut the labels to get them in the tabs?? what? really?
    she never communicated her concern to me. i would have made her personalized tabs or reimbursed her or something...!..!
    this seems very unfair and gives the buyer way too much power over the seller.
    please - make it a part of the etsy etiquette that you must first contact the seller and try to work out the concern before you can leave neutral feedback.
    this will give the seller a chance to remedy the problem -or not.
    i would do everything in my power to make a customer happy - but how can you when they can just leave any comment they want without any guidelines!?
    please help! that situation really upset me.
    i have over 100 postive comments about my quality, fast shipping, good communication... i realize there are going to be some folks in this world that you can never please. but the current etsy feedback system does not allow for the seller to stand up for themselves and their shop.

    thank you so much for listening,
    July 20, 2009 at 3:34 p.m. ababietoy


    I am tempted to send an email to etsy admin about this issue...anyone else wanna make their voice heard? PS-thx to Pixel Wild Child for sending me that link!

  14. oh boy! did i learn this by experiencing it myself! not a good feeling =(

  15. I learned this the hard way on eBay. From a buyer who was a seller...it was so bad...I will never sell on eBay again/sold my couple of shares of eBay stock!LOl Traded for Amazon!

  16. I admire what you have done here. I love the part where you say you are doing this to give back but I would assume by all the comments that is working for you as well. Do you have any more info on this?
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